My child who loses things
June 5, 2012 in Uncategorized
My child is a serial loser. And I don’t mean she can’t find her breakfast and I don’t mean she’s not going to amount to anything. She’s going to go far. Heed my words. ……………….. as long as she doesn’t leave something vital behind.
Ever since she’s been responsible for her own stuff she’s managed to systematically lose things. Maybe she just doesn’t like the stuff I buy and/or make her??? In Grade R she was losing up to three things a week including clothing, lunch boxes, stationery, extramural bags/clothes/goodies. Her record was a hand-made denim tennis racquet bag with her name embroidered on the side in bright orange thread (that I was mighty proud of, I can tell you). She managed to hang on to that for two and a half weeks before it wandered off into the netherworld of Jerry’s Lost Stuff.
And because she is heeltemal tweetalig (totally bilingual) she appears to be both loskop AND ditsy. Sjoe! Yesterday evening she was playing with the dogs in her new “character shoes” that I was required to buy for her upcoming ballet exam. I instructed her to take them off immediately because they cost me an arm, a leg and a small left bollock, and this morning – less than 12 hours later – she could only find one. SIGH!!! Confronted by her mother’s purple face (whilst I blew steam out of my ears) she quickly remembered where the other one was. This obviously works but my blood pressure just won’t cope with prolonged purple-facedness.
I’ve tried talking nicely, I’ve tried yelling, I’ve tried a tear or two, I’ve tried removing privileges, I’ve tried grounding, I’ve tried a smacked bottom and now I’ve decided to go hard core. This term, i.e. since 10th April, i.e. within the last 56 days, she has managed to lose BOTH pairs of her winter school trousers. Today I informed her that I’m not buying more. She can wear her gym slip and tights. And if her tights get holes she can mend them. And if she gets cold well that’s just tough.
So there we were this morning. I was being peered at by a pale face. She’d pulled her jersey sleeves down over her hands and she is wearing an old pyjama top as a vest ………. because she LOST the one I made her last weekend ………. “Ek is baie koud, Mamma.” ………. doing her best puppy-dog impression and you know what? This Mamma doesn’t even feel guilty. Ok, well maybe a little, OK I FEEL BLOODY DREADFUL. But do you think this is going to work? Well do ya?
Happy Day …… or should that read Exasperated Day!!!