You are browsing the archive for 2011 April.

Odd sensations

April 21, 2011 in Uncategorized

Morning ladies, hope you are well!

Did the urine tests yesterday, and my pH balance is totally deurmekaar – but there’s no sign of infection. So I’m drinking Acti-Fizz to see if it helps, but I’m still in pain and this morning when I woke up I felt odd. I have this unpleasant, uneasy sensation in my stomach. I hope that the deurmekaar pH doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with Spikkel, and my mother is urging me to get to a doctor to get everything checked out, but the gynae resolutely refuses to see me until my original appointment. So I have to wait until next Friday and hope that it’s just my bladder moving and uterus stretching and my body adjusting to Spikkel’s growth.

I’m still feeling odd. I’m hoping that this day will pass swiftly, not just because it’s loooooooooooong weekend/week, but because I have this pressing need to just rest and to escape all the crap of this place. Relax. I didn’t want to get up this morning, and Hubby also got me in a gutterclutch just as I was moving to sit upright.

As for the traffic, it’s lovely right now. Left ten minutes later than usual and still got here at 07:50. The earlier the better – we work flexi time and can leave as soon as we put in our 8 hours.

The office is in uproar right now because everyone thought they were getting their salaries today, but the payroll is only being finalized today and the salaries paid… so everyone made their plans and are now without money. Some are going away for this time, and they have to wait til Saturday… And I feel responsible. I’m an HR assistant, and I was told that we’d be paid on the 21st.

My song for today – Florence and the Machine – Heavy in your arms… awesome song. It’s on the Eclipse soundtrack (or so I hear) and it will be my anthem for today :)

Anyway, while I’m struggling to get through this tedious day (it’s only 08:06 and it feels like I’ve been here for hours) you ladies must have a great day and Easter. If you’re travelling, please do so safely.

And let us not forget why it’s Easter. Christ died for our sins and rose again. Thank you Lord!

Tourmaline

Answer to the problem

April 20, 2011 in Uncategorized

Bless my MIL… she’s so smart.

She’s suspecting that the cramping might have something to do with bladder infection. My bladder has been really sore these past few days, especially when urinating. I woke up in the middle of last night with a very painful ”noot” and when I went to the loo there wasn’t even that much urine. But my bladder is very painful.

So I’m going for urine tests this afternoon and apparently Citro Soda is okay for a pregnant woman… MIL knows best so…

Further, today is a sucky day. I’m really irritated with people’s moods and power trips and it’s getting me down rapidly. There’s a bubble of frustration lodged just beneath my diaphragm and it’s going to blow soon…

Pity to the poor people it’s going to blow at…

I have to be really really careful what I say, because since finding out I’m pregnant, my excellent talent for employing tact and diplomacy has gone out the window, and I say a thing like it is. Not sure if that’s good or not.

Sorry for venting on you lovely ladies, and thank you that I can speak my mind!

Tourmaline

Cramping

April 20, 2011 in Uncategorized

Morning guys, hope you’re all well!

I’m somewhere in the 7 weeks pregnant now, and this morning as I’m sitting here at my desk blogging, I’m experiencing the occassional sharp cramp in my abdomen. It comes and goes, but I want to know from you girls if this is normal? I know Spikkel is in his/her crucial stage of development, but this is rather alarming as I don’t know what it means.

I’m going for my first appointment next week Friday, and I’m rather nervous. Will Spikkel be okay? Will he be on par with his development? Will his heart be beating? Will it be strong? What if there’s something wrong? Will we be able to deal with it?

Are these fears and questions normal???

The closer the gynae appointment comes, the more nervous I get. Because I’m afraid that in the four weeks I didn’t know I was pregnant, I might have caused irreperable damage to my baby. I was having the occasional Richelieu with my husband and friends, I was smoking…a lot! I’m afraid that if there is something wrong with my baby, it will be all my fault and that people will judge me for it. “Why were you doing those things in the first place? Especially smoking!!”

A lot of people tell me that they’ve smoked right through their pregnancies. Yeah, maybe you did. But today, my friend’s son is a hyperactive child with asthma on top of it. I don’t want that. I have to admit that I’m struggling with the smoking, because Hubby still smokes. I asked him to please consider quitting now, now that he’s no longer under pressure to find a job. Yes, that’s why we smoked – it was a crutch.  A smelly expensive crutch. Even now I’m wondering why I’m still craving it, now that I’m putting it in perspective for myself. And I’m hoping that he’ll quit soon. Even if he smokes outside, the smell still reaches me and sometimes it churns my stomach, other times it makes me wanna grab it and smoke that thing right down to the filter.

As Freddie Mercury sang – I want to break free…

If anyone can assist with the cramping thing, I’d be very grateful. This is kind of worrying me, and I just had another strong cramp.

Thank you for reading! God bless.

Tourmaline

Surprises…

April 19, 2011 in Uncategorized

Good morning all

I got home yesterday after a reasonably balanced day – good things and irritating things included. Good in the sense that I left work 10 minutes late and got home the same time; there was practically no traffic which was a joy. Irritating in the sense that for some people at work, double standards seem to be the norm and I have had enough of being pulled in. Might just be the pregnancy hormones making me even more direct than usual, but I’ve decided that I will not get into trouble just because said person cannot make up her mind.

Hubby proudly planted himself in front of me and asked me if I noticed if anything was different. I looked around and being relatively tired and irated, couldn’t see anything but my shoes lying around and two hyperactive cats trying to get my attention. He proubly pointed out the new teeny-tiny dvd player he’d bought (our old one had gone into the light) and I was nodding my head and smiling, while thinking ”men and their gadgets”. Only when he switched it on and the intro to Harry Potter and the Deahtly Hallows part 1 started, I finally caught on and all my irritation evaporated. He totally made my day! He bought me the dvd as our 1 year and 7 month annerversary.

Okay, please don’t hold the Harry Potter thing against me – I’m a huge fan of the books and JK Rowling wrote them exceptionally well, and I have this nasty habit of comparing the books to the movies. I’ve only passed the quarter-life threshold so I think I can still get away with it <blush> My husband displays a very patient tolerance with me because of my love of books and all things fictional, especially fantasy and always just shakes his head when I disappear in a book. But he doesn’t mind when we watch the movie and he doesn’t understand something, and asks me what led up to it. I’m an encyclopedia on my own.

Was at work nice and early today, didn’t have any stranded colleagues to pick up for work, so I got here and made a cup of tea and settled at my pc. One thing I did decide though, is that I will only listen to Jacaranda in the mornings, cos the song repeats are too much for me. Who wants to hear Bruno Mars catch a grenade 4 times a day? Or Katy Perry shooting fireworks at her lovey 5 times a day? Not me. I love music, but that is just too much. So from now on, I will listen to the Just Plain Breakfast, and as soon as it’s done, switch over my radio to my playlist. Or tune into another station.

Random post today, sorry about that but I enjoy blogging my random thoughts. Thank you for reading, I appreciate it.

Tourmaline

Joy and fatigue…

April 18, 2011 in Uncategorized

Good morning everyone, I hope you had a splendid weekend. Mine was way too busy for my liking. Too little rest and too many people!

I’m sure you’ll all want to know what happened with Hubby’s job… he sms’ed me at 15:26 PM on Friday as I was driving home (we got an hour off work as it was the Big Cheese’s birthday) with the absolutely fabulous announcement that he got the job. With a very cryptic ‘but wait, there’s more!’ attached. I was ecstatic and couldn’t wait to get home.

He filled me in when I got there. He got twice as much on his salary as he required – I couldn’t believe it, I nearly fell off the couch while sitting still! And best of all, they’re going to put us on the medical immediately! Spikkel will come into this life in a proper hospital!!

I am so relieved and Hubby is very restless as he is only starting on the 3rd of May. He’s at home still this week and doing odd jobs for my stepfather and also his father, keeping busy and making a little bit of extra money. But he is very excited, and so am I.

All the honor and glory to God!!

On the downside, I forgot to take my pregnancy vitamins this weekend and I’m so tired today because of that. My body’s adjusted already and suddenly I deprive it of what’s good for it. Silly sausage!!

So today is a bit of a struggle, but we can only hope that this week will pass quickly. Although when there are public holidays involved, the week normally passes slowly. But I’m listening to music and working at my own pace. The payroll is finished so now I can do whatever comes up!

You all must have a wonderful day, and thanks for reading!

Tourmaline

Nervous…

April 15, 2011 in Uncategorized

I am so nervous today…

My husband is being retrenched end of April and it’s been a hectic job-hunt so far this month. The company has allowed him to stay at home and still get paid, but the retrenchment will go through end of the month.

He went for an interview that he’s been waiting for for very long now on Wednesday, and today is the day he will hear if he got the job or not.

I just hope he takes it… and that is why I’m nervous.

He’s hoping to get back into his current company in order to stay on the medical so that little Spikkel and I will be covered for the doctors appointments and all. But I don’t want him to stay there just for that. This new place will also provide us with a medical and everything will be fine.

The old company has treated my hard-working husband like a piece of squirrel turd ever since he started beginning 2009. They cheated him out of his performance bonus. And they made his position redundant, along with 14 others just because it’s cheaper to import the welding rods they manufactured than to actually manufacture it.

Retrenchment happens. A lot. I’m not bitter about that. I just don’t want him to go back, because God only knows how long he’ll last until they find some next excuse to get rid of him.

I’m really praying that he will break free from what’s bad for him and us, and look forward to something new – also a new challenge. He’s a man that has to be challenged, and wants to be satisfied with his job and the work he’s accomplished for the day. I just want him to have that job satisfaction that he’s so desperately wanted for the last two years. He always gives his best, and that makes me so proud.

Please hold thumbs with me girls!

Have a splendid day today and enjoy your weekend!

Tourmaline

Baby badge

April 14, 2011 in Uncategorized

Can anyone of you lovely ladies please help me find that baby badge where it shows the growing foetus and the number of days to go? I’ve always wanted one of them :-D

Thanks girls!

You are awesome!

Tourmaline

6 weeks and counting…

April 14, 2011 in Uncategorized

Hi All

I joined this blog a little while ago but after having some struggles about the blog community placement (I somehow ended up in another community and not parent24 blogs) I had to delete my blog en start all over. So here I am.

I’ve been married now for 1 year and 7 months to a wonderful, funny man and I’ve been broody even before our wedding. Things just never happened and I think for good reason, as there were a lot of financial troubles to follow, along with a smashed bakkie that wasn’t insured. We moved to my father’s smallholding thinking that everything will be alright, but alas, it was not. Everyone knows what happens when a young married couple lives with one or the other’s parents. It’s not good.

So we eventually got our own place again, after also having some health problems. Endometriosis – very badly and it was removed last year June. And even though the doctors swore that I am 100% healthy, I still couldn’t fall pregnant. It was starting to become an unhealthy obsession and I just didn’t want to be like that. Not to mention I drove my husband crazy.

My brother phoned me end of January with the very happy news that his wife is pregnant – and this was amazing because they’ve been waiting and trying so long after her miscarriage a week before our wedding. It was about time. And that’s about when we decided to pack it in and stop trying so badly, to give them their nine months in the light and the chance for our families to enjoy their babies.  I stopped thinking about it, and gave the incessant need to God.

A couple of weeks ago, my breasts started becoming very tender and painful to the touch. I thought I was going to have a hectic menstrual cycle and thought nothing of it further, as they always get sore before the time. But Aunt Flow was mysteriously missing. At first I realized that I miscalculated my cycle and was due to start, but it still didn’t.

On Monday 28 March 2011 I tried to calm my pounding heart as I walked into the pharmacy and bought a pregnancy test. My period was a few days late by now. My heart and brain was in fierce battle. Yes you are, no you’re not. Something like that. My period was late the month before, but only by a day and I was now almost 3 days late. So I bought the test but when I got home, I felt rebellious. I didn’t want to do this again and be disappointed.  So my husband came home and poured us each a drink, and I smoked my normal menthol cigarettes while trying to work up the courage to do this (I know, smoking BAD!!!) He finally told me to just stop being a hard-ass and to go do the test.

I didn’t look at it at all. I left the bathroom and five minutes later, he went in to check it. There was only one line, and when I looked, the second one was starting to show. A few minutes later, it was almost as clear as the other one and we looked at each other in shock. We jumped in the car, raced to the pharmacy to buy another one and went home to sit and stare at each other in shock some more.

I couldn’t sleep that night. I did, but it felt like the weirdest, most disturbed sleep ever. I woke up at 05:10 AM and got up to do the second one. It went positive immediately and I woke up my husband to tell him. I let my boss know that I was going to the doctor later and that I would come in afterwards, and then waited for the time to pass.

At 13:50 PM the call came. I was on tenterhooks. And they told me “congratulations, you are about 4 weeks pregnant”.

My world came to a standstill… I couldn’t believe it.

It took me a little more than two weeks to get used to the idea of a little one joining our familiy in a couple of months, and the responsibility of it scared me breathless. But I’ve started to come round. I’ve quit smoking already, no alcahol, very little sugar and caffeine, and as much water and healthy foods as I can take. I’ve remedied the horrendous morning sickness with a vitamin B12 shot and I’m feeling great. Except for the draining tiredness.

But we are looking forward.

Thanks for reading this, I appreciate it.

Tourmaline

Hello world

April 14, 2011 in Uncategorized

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