The journey progresses...

Motherhood has altered me completely. I’m not the same woman I used to be and I believe I have been changed for the better. My entire existence revolves around my family. My husband and my child.

I watched ’16 and pregnant’ on MTV last night and I was so upset. My heart went out to that poor baby; stuck with a bratty teenage mother who only thinks of herself and her own needs and entertainment. She only wants to party and Grandma is looking after that beautiful, forlorn little baby boy. Now I can’t imagine putting my own selfish needs above Caleb’s. The mother kept complaining about how hard it is to be a mother. How getting up in the middle of the night kills her. And all I could think was ‘if you kept your legs closed like you’re supposed to for another couple of years, you wouldn’t be in this situation’. I also thought ‘oh stop your adolescent bitching, it’s not that hard!’ Her problem was how the baby constantly needed her. And she hated being constantly needed. I love it. I love being my baby’s safe haven. Her problem was constantly feeding and changing her baby. I don’t mind at all. I breastfeed my baby and get to spend quality time with him all day.

This is one of the most important lessons I want to teach my children – if you’re not ready to deal with consequences that will alter your life, don’t do it!! Don’t have sex until you’re ready to deal with what comes afterward!! Be it emotional strain, hurt, pregnancy, an STD… (I’m talking from a teenager perspective). Only dabble with sex if you can handle it!

I may sound horribly judgemental but I can’t help it. Since becoming a mother I’ve become fiercely protective of babies. I can’t stand anyone treating a baby with anything less than devotion, respect and responsibility. I can’t stand anyone talking about their baby like it’s a dog that gets in the way.

I just looked at that girl and wondered how could she talk about giving the baby up for adoption after being his mother for a month… did she not feel any kind of love for him? Luckily she decided to keep the baby and told her mother that she couldn’t do it without her (after telling her mother to f@ck off out of her life – that alone is unacceptable) but I still pity that little baby so much, for being dependant on her.

Sorry, I’m being horrible. Sorry sorry sorry!!

Things are better between me and Hubby. From tonight, we’re taking turns bathing Caleb. I told him this is his child too and I resent the fact that I’m doing almost everything. It’s not just doing a duty like changing a diaper, or bathing the baby. It’s about quality time!! He has to spend quality time with his son. Five minutes of goo-gooing with Caleb is not quality time. We didn’t talk about his stunt with the dummy, but if he ever pulls such a stunt again, there will be consequences that he’s not going to like.

TMI warning – I have a really sore nether region (at the back). The aambui just won’t go away, and now I’ve got a pitsweer type of thing there as well. I get it sometimes, I don’t know why. And getting rid of it is gonna be hard…

Anyhoo, off to change Caleb’s nappy and have some breakfast!

Have a good day!

Tourmaline

Since last night at about 18:00, Hubby and I have barely spoken to each other. For the first time ever, I went to bed angry and silent. Or to couch, depends on how you want to look at it.

All three of us had a nice nap from about 16:00. Caleb on me, and Hubby on his couch. I woke up and watched part of a movie that was on and then my phone rang, it was my mother telling me about another creche she saw in their street. Caleb then started to fuss (I had put him back in his cot) and while I was talking to my mom I registered that it was past his feeding time. I beckoned to Hubby to just take him out and help him with his dummy while I finished up with my mom. He yanked Caleb out of his crib and plonked him down on his lap and told him to ‘SLEEP!!’ I just finished up then and was going to tell him that Caleb just woke up from a long sleep when he started pounding him on the back, unnecessarily hard. And I just snapped. Stupid, intolerant, impatient fool! I jumped up and plucked Caleb up from his lap while he was vehemently protesting, trying to hold on. I told him that if he’s going to abuse Caleb just because he’s an intolerant dumbass, he’ll never have hold of his child again. He flung Caleb’s dummy at me at full speed and missed luckily, and hit the couch. Then he jumped up. I should piss him off more often, he cleans when he’s pissed off. Anyway, I just decided there’s no way that I’m going to apologize for anything. He’s got to start working on his idiotic temper. I hate it. He’s got to reach some point where he realizes that acting and reacting like a child doesn’t work. He’s an adult for pete’s sake. I was millimetres away from packing Caleb in the car and leaving for my mom’s. But that won’t go down with my mother, nor Hubby. My mother will just send me right back home. I should have gone to my MIL – she’s home alone at the moment.

I know I’m being just as petty as Hubby, but he’s not living up to his promises. He’s lost his ability to admit when he’s made a mistake, and just clamps shut. And I’ve stopped working to keep things open as well. I’m always the one who apologizes, the one who keeps our faith alive, the one who keeps trying to support us both emotionally. I realized it last night when I told him to get out of my way and not to talk to me. I also realized that things can’t keep going like this, otherwise we’re going to end up where I don’t want to end up – divorced. I’m going to have to talk to him tonight. But at this moment, I’m exhausted. Exhausted of all my efforts; being mother and wife and support pillar. I talk to him about going back to church and he responds with about as much enthusiasm as he shows when he has to go for some sort of shot at the doctor’s. It worries me. He seems determined to fall back into the life he used to have. Smoking, drinking, kuiering and idiotic friends who can’t get a clue. A part of me wants to send him off to go do just that, and the other part of me holds on because of my love for him.

I’m not in a good place.

To make things worse the idiot didnt’ set his alarm clock last night and only woke up at 7:00 this morning… the time that he’s supposed to be at work. See, even there… he’s too slapgat to take responsibility to wake up himself. Why do I have to do everything?! He stomped around trying to finish up, all the while exuding this air of ‘why didn’t you wake me?’ While Caleb was up twice during the night and I had to be up with him, trying to get him back to sleep. Hubby lives such a charmed life. I don’t wake him for anything during the night anymore, so that he can get his precious sleep because he’s working. I change the diapers, I do the feeding, I do the bathing. I do f#$%^&* everything, and it’s just about time that this man starts bucking up and starts carrying his weight. I’ve had enough. He either starts bringing his side, or he can carry on on his own. Might sound extreme, but screw it. I’m tired.

The only spark in my life right now at this very moment is Caleb. He’s now ten weeks old, I can’t believe it. And so big! My brother told me on Friday afternoon that Caleb is taller than Jordan and heavier too. He’s communicating all the more and has started laughing. Not out of his belly, but he attempts it. He’s starting to grasp things with his little hands but only if you put them there. His dummy is his favorite thing to grasp. He’s enjoying bath time, kicking and giggling and smiling. Brother told me last night that they’ve started Jordan on Isomil and that her farts have substantially worsened LOL. We’ll start Caleb on Isomil at the end of this month. He’s going for his 10 week shots next Monday and then we’ll discuss formula and expressed milk. I have no idea how Midwife wants me to express enough so that Caleb will have a bottle for each feed. It’s impossible. Last time I tried expressing as much as possible, my supply started drying up.

Lastly – Love is willingly putting down your half-eaten, much-anticipated plate of sticky ribs to first go bath your son because his bath time has passed without you noticing. Hehe, the ribs were great and the kuier with my dad wonderful! Also signed our new lease agreement and sent it through to the lady, but Klossiegat (Hubby) forgot to pay the deposit. Baka… sorry, it means idiot in Japanese.

Not a good start to my week. Sorry for the moan post, and forgive me for being unreasonable and petty… I’ll feel better later and actually start behaving like the adult I am.

Cheerio

Tourmaline

I woke up this morning at 5:15 feeling severely disoriented. Why, do you ask? Because Caleb slept through.

I can’t believe it. I’m convinced it was a one-time fluke. He didn’t sleep all that much during the day yesterday so last night when it was time to go to sleep he was fighting it; he was over-tired. And when he passed out, he turned himself over on to his tummy from his side and just slept. I woke up during the night, so in tune with waking up and not once did I hear him. So in my sleepy state I just turned around and slept further. And woke up this morning severely shocked that we both had a full night’s sleep. I’m hoping it happens again tonight, but I doubt it.

Jordan is definitely teething. My brother whatsapp’ed me last night and asked for any home remedies, the Teejel doesn’t work. We offered to drive over there and take the Prodol we’ve got but then the ice cloth they used for her seemed to work. Shame, he says her little gums are swollen and red and she was crying like he’s never heard her cry before. Poor baby

Migraine AGAIN today. Like it’s biting me in the ass (or in this case the brain) again for not sleeping it off properly yesterday. And my father arrived at 9:00, so we’ve been chatting for the past hour and a half. Caleb is sleeping now, so I’m going to make the most of it and try to catch a wink or two myself.

Y’all must have a wonderful weekend!

Cheerio

Tourmaline

How damn expensive is food??? Wow! Went grocery shopping yesterday afternoon, bargained on getting away with a cheaper load but now… didn’t even buy EVERYthing as we have lots of spares like pastas, tomato & onion mix and rice etc. But now, still had to cough up R 1500!! WTF!! Our meat today was R410-00 luckily… Gotta love Helga’s in Silverton! Hubby got all our meat, a 1 litre tub of ice cream and a six pack beer all for that price!!

The little teeth are definitely starting to come in. Caleb is gumming everything he can find. He gums my wrists, my fingers, his fingers, his wrists, his teether, his dummy… It’s so cute watching him suck his little thumb and he doesn’t do it conventionally either. He spreads his four other fingers out, therefore poking himself in the eye. His little gums are becoming white now and he’s blowing spit bubbles. Also drooling substantially.

In other news, I had a toasted cheese, tomato and onion sarmie for lunch and no cramps yet! That was at 14:00 and I fed him just before 15:00 (or is it after??) And NO CRAMPS!! YES!! I won’t be pushing my luck yet, though. The other night I made us a Tuna Mate concoction and decided to chance some garlic, and also nothing. Will take it easy with the onion and garlic introduction. Don’t want to overload his little intestines.

Had a migraine again this morning (hence the heartless bitch part). It’s hard to have a migraine and to take care of a baby that needs you. My head felt like it was gonna explode, but luckily I took a suppository, a nausea pill and painpills and both of us clutched out on the couch soon after. The domestic was laughing at me later when I woke up. Asked if we had a nice nap, it didn’t look very comfortable. Hey, it worked for me. Shame poor Hubby. I asked him if he could come home, and later when I felt better told him it’s not necessary any more. He still came home. Took half day’s leave after he finished all his work and came to take care of us. Didn’t get to sleep more but I’m gonna enjoy it tonight. We’re chucking out the damn cheap-ass air mattress. The thing somehow got punctured and runs flat quicker than you can say ‘fart’. Wanted to go return the air mattress but I don’t Hubby has the receipt anymore. Or maybe I do… hmmm will have to go check.

I’m so glad Nats decided to stay! The blogworld would not be the same without you, my friend! We’re with you all the way on your journey, don’t you ever think that you’re not wanted, or don’t deserve to be here!!

Like this Terra Nova thing that just started on Mnet. Watching the rerun on Mnet now. Awesome, it’s a lot like Avatar. Just a bit more normal without insanely huge blue people running or flying around on huge-ass draak-like stuffs.

Anyhoo, cheerio! Have a good one!

Tourmaline

Phoned Agent-Lady… our application has been approved! So now we have to get the electricity on in February and then we can get access to the gates and keys! Yaaaaaay! The electricity deposit is R 900-00 though… hope we get it back when we ever want to move!

Also phoned the creche, Brabbel Bekkies… going to have a look tomorrow morning. The lady is my stepdad’s cousin, so we’ll see how things look!

My dad is coming tomorrow and he’s bringing us three packs of sweet and sticky marinated ribs… I can’t wait! It’s a mess to eat but the best ribs I’ve ever tasted. LOL And I can’t wait to see my dad either! he’s going to sleep over… Hubby and I will sleep on our couches again, the air mattress is f@$%^… stupid thing is a month old and punctured somehow!! Damn it!

Gotta go feed my little man!!

Adios

Tourmaline

No, not people who bug me… there aren’t a lot of those and as a result of that, I’m not sinning as much – thank goodness. LOL I’m very grateful that right now I’m surrounded by loveable family and friends. I really have nothing to moan about in that area.

What I do moan about today is also of God’s creation, although I in my silly human-ness can’t see the point of their existence… Ants. Bedbugs. These are currently the two pests in my life, and my house. Caleb got bitten by a bedbug the other day. Can you imagine a poor baby having to deal with that eina??? What the hell? Can’t the effing things just DIE??? We’re going to ring up our water and electricity to high heaven if we wash EVERY SINGLE THING in our house and tumbledry it all. Apparently the heat kills them. How the hell do you tumble dry your mattress, eh??? And the things that aren’t supposed to be tumble dried… I am declaring war. Wanna lock the cats out of the house for a couple or hours and fumigate the entire place times 3!!! Die bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The neighbors are AWOL. I don’t know where they are but they’ve been gone for more than a week. I don’t know who’s feeding their dog but the damn thing howls like a werewolf out of loneliness. It starts howling at 5 AM and goes on periodically during the day. WTF??? How can they just up and leave without taking care of their dog? Thinking about phoning Wetnose. There’s also a sick-looking cat here, it’s nose is all red and infected. The owner doesn’t seem to be taking care of it the way she should. And now one of those sores have started on its body too. I’m really considering phoning Wetnose and asking them to come take the animals away that the people don’t care for.

Update on the house – the agent-lady hasn’t come back to me regarding our application for the place. I’m assuming she’s not sending the banking details because we still need to be approved. I sms’ed her again this morning and asked her what’s going on and I’m not hearing anything back, so I’m starting to worry. What’s up?? I swear, if she tells us all bets are off, I’m going to pop an artery and drive to Benoni and smack her so hard she’ll wonder what year it is. Don’t make promises that you can’t keep. Don’t tell us everything will be fine and then just disappear. We’re counting on this place. We’re counting on her. As for this place, one of the other people has put down deposit so it’s official.

I need to phone the creche that I want to put Caleb in. Got to load some airtime real quick!!

Can’t believe it’s Wednesday already. Wow how time flies. The domestic is at one of her other employers today, she’ll come tomorrow.

Sorry for the short post, and sorry for moaning and threatening to smack people I don’t really know. Not a wonderful day today. There’s nothing on TV; I’ve resorted to watching The 40-year old virgin. Again. And then I’ll probably traipse through all the rest of our dvd’s. Going grocery shopping this afternoon with Caleb in tow. We already did it once, we’ll come right again!!

Cheerio, have a good one.

Tourmaline

Survivor Samoa! And already there’s a guy I detest – Russell, from Foa Foa… just there to stir things up. And he’s gonna be difficult to vote out, because he’s being very sneaky about it. Very strategic. Throwing out all the water just to stir. He’s a damn oil company owner; so he’s not there for the money. I hope someone puts two and two together soon and votes out the SOB.

We have two takers for our place. If the one doesn’t pay deposit by 9:30, the other person gets it. The one is a family of four, I’m guessing the kids share the second room (girl of 6 and boy of 2) and then the mother and father. They want to bring their staffie but it’s not allowed, it’s dangerous to the other cats (who get preference above dogs in this complex, by the way) and it’s too big. Only small dogs are allowed. Landlady told him that if they can leave the dog, they can have the place. It they don’t comply or don’t pay in time, the other family will get the place. Ja, it’s like winning first or second prize, but with a choice. Oi vey.

But ja. It’s done. No matter what, the place is taken. We’re moving end of February. I have to get boxes and start packing. Our deposit will be in tomorrow morning so we can pay our new place. Then we can get access to the new complex so long and start carting over all the stuff we’re not using. Books, clothes, everything. I can’t wait. I can’t wait to cook in my new kitchen, bath Caleb in our new bath, shower in our new shower and FINALLY sleep in our own bed. I can’t wait to be close to the huge Pick n Pay we buy our groceries at, to be close to my mother.

I feel a bit guilty about the cats though. Here they’ve got a garden to play in. They regularly sleep under the cycad in the garden; lots of shelter from the hot sun. There, they will have no garden. Just grass. I’m thinking we have to get a garden planted there. Maybe not a cycad as they’re damn expensive but some kind of shrub or tree. More than one.

Skrikked my ass of at 4:41 this morning. A huge clap of thunder woke me, and Caleb too. Luckily he didn’t cry, he just woke up and lay gurgling in his cot. I got up to cover him again and give him his dummy and then went back to sleep. Our air mattress got a puncture somehow. So it’s either back to the couches, or back upstairs where it’s still so damn hot. I was bathing Caleb last night and the sweat was running down my back. And his bathwater isn’t all that hot. I feel bad for my dad. He’s coming this week and he’ll be staying over so he can have the bed, and we’ll sleep downstairs.The new place’s roof is insulated and the floors carpeted, and still it’s not so hot there as here.

Off to make myself a sandwich and have a glass of milk, while Caleb is lying on the couch, chewing his hands and chatting and kicking. My adorable little man! All the ladies who came in here yesterday couldn’t believe that he’s 9 weeks old, as he’s so tall and sturdy! He’s getting to be a heavy weight to carry around in your arms! But a real charmer, gives whoever coos in his face a gummy smile. And he’s started to attempt giggles! It’s the cutest thing ever, even Hubby melts and laughs along.

A friend of mine’s dad is having heart surgery today. A dubbel hartomleiding. Not sure what that is in English. Praying all goes well! This after a lifetime of smoking and drinking… Sigh. Hope recovery comes on swift wings to Uncle Paul!

Have a good day everyone. If it’s raining where you are, enjoy! If it’s warm, stay cool!!

Cheerio

Tourmaline

There are 7 different people coming here tonight to look at the house. My phone has been ringing crazily off the hook the whole morning. Thank goodness it’s quiet now. And please, may one of them just put down deposit so we can get ours back, for pete’s sake! We need to put it down on the new place. As soon as possible!

The lady didn’t advertise the place yet and we have first option, which we have taken now, but we still need to put down deposit! Grrrr. Hopefully someone will phone Landlady tonight and pay the damn deposit tonight as well and just get it done!!

Spoke to Manager Lady this morning. She’s 27 weeks now and starting to get uncomfortable. Baby Girl is kicking her awake at night and getting close to the ribs, and also hiccupping like a mad little thing! She doesn’t want me to arrange a baby shower for her… but I want to! She’s gonna be a hard-ass. I know that work will be having a baby shower for her regardless of her protests, so maybe we should be happy with that. I just know that I really want to shop for her, get her bottles, clothes and creams and ointments. I’d like to put together a little medicine kit for her like my MIL did for me. It’s the best ever.

Also anxiously waiting for news on our other colleague who’s been on maternity leave for two weeks now. She was 38 weeks then so it should be any day now, that her little boy enters this world as well. Can’t wait!

It was drizzling this morning, lovely… and then the sun just HAD to come out again. Can’t it just rain for a week already??? Come on!!

So off I go to tidy up further… it’s really getting old now. The place has to be spic n span for the strangers trawling through our house, and it’s got to end now. I have to leave something for the domestic to do, don’t I??

And then I have to feed my little monster He’s lying next to me on the couch, kicking me and gurgling and giggling away! As if he’s saying ‘leave that alone mommy, and look at me! Just me!’

Of course, my boy. Just you!!!

Cheerio

Tourmaline

We. Got. A. House….

Whoooooooooooooooooo!!! It’s the one we looked at on Saturday. You know, the complex that we looked at last year and Huby didn’t want it because there wasn’t a sufficient roof at the front door to keep us dry when unlocking it if it’s raining. But this time he was open-minded. The place is absolutely perfect for us. Just enough space for all our stuff with some to spare. The kitchen is gorgeous. The garage is huge. Caleb’s room is nice and cool. So is ours. Lots of closets. Lots of yard space. Lots of place for Hubby to braai. For the umbrella. The blow-up pool. Close to Stepdad’s cousin’s creche. Close to all the shops we need to be close to. It’s just peachy. We let the agent know this afternoon that we’re taking it and that we’ll pay deposit asap. Now we’re just waiting for someone to bite for our current place. Lots of interest, but no takers. I’m guessing it’s because it’s not pay-day yet. People want the place but they haven’t got the money. I’ll run the ad again this week. Really hoping someone takes it soon.

Caleb is now 9weeks old. He’s started to attempt to giggle. It’s so cute I just want to burst. He’s chatting and smiling and we just can’t get enough. He’s also too big for the tub I’ve been bathing him in for the past month and a half. He had his first big-bath last night, along with Daddy. Tonight I’ll attempt another tactic that my mom told me about. He’s stretching insanely.

I have to make an appointment at the paed’s again for him next week. For his blood count test. I’ll have the blood count test done and then take it to the doc, fully prepared. But Caleb is fine, I can feel and see it. All the yellow is gone and he’s healthy. Gorgeous. Friendly. Cute.

I was telling Hubby over the weekend how things have changed. In the beginning, I was afraid to put Caleb down for even a minute. Afraid that he might cry or scream. Afraid that I might be neglecting him just by going to the bathroom. How every little squeak and sound had me running over and nervously checking if he’s okay. How I desperately hoped to be able to sleep when he did. And how everything has changed since then. Now, everything is easy. I know Caleb and he knows me. I know what his cries mean; when to pick him up and when he’s just chatting.  We’re comfortable with each other. We have a routine. Even Hubby is so much more tolerant. More patient. It’s awesome. All of a sudden my compulsion to nag Hubby into remembering things are no longer necessary. He remembers. We have adapted to less sleep. I’m sure that there are some nights that it will be even less, but we’ll deal with it.

Of course I know it won’t always be easy. But for now, it’s easier than I ever thought it would be. I know the teeth are coming. And I’m hoping and praying that he’ll be an easy teether. I know the terrible twos will come. I know it will be a challenge to discipline, to be patient and to pay attention. I know one day he’ll be a teenager. Hopefully he’ll rather take after me than his dad; I never rebelled. I was rustig. Hubby was the angry rebel. But I am truly grateful that we have such a good-natured little boy. He’s rustig. He’s a pleasure to be around. He’s a pleasure to wake up for in the middle of the night to feed. I’d do anything for this child. I’d do anything for his father. I would also do anything (one day) to have another one. I want a little girl, one day. One that takes after me as much as Caleb looks like his dad. I can already tell that these two are going to be great friends one day. I’m hoping for another addition that will be my little clone. I wish to be that perfect balance between mother who loves her kids and someone they can talk to about anything. A mother who can be strict and lay down the rules but still be flexible enough to let the kids develop into who they are at their own speed. I don’t want to be pushy, naggy or interfering. Yes, I will screen their dates one day. Give my opinion on this guy or that girl. I will make sure my children know about sex, and about contraception. STD’s. Pregnancy. I will ensure they know how to be safe and that sex is only for when you truly love someone. And I will pray for them every single day. EVERY SINGLE DAY.

Anyhoo, there’s a piece of braai’d chicken and a braaibroodjie with my name on it and it calls to me.

Hope y’all have a great week.

Cheerio.

Tourmaline

I’ve got a stupid runny nose and a nasal drip… whee… Don’t know where this came from now but I really hope I’m not getting sick! Speaking of which, SIL’s got a combination of a stomach bug and a bit of food poisoning. I was going to visit her again today but decided not to, I don’t want to catch whatever she’s got (hope it doesn’t sound selfish or conceited!) But if I’d known she was sick yesterday, I would have offered to get her to a doctor sooner than after work when my brother comes home.

I visited her mos on Wednesday… left Caleb with her quickly to go buy us some cupcakes and juice and nappies for Caleb… went to the ATM to draw the domestic’s pay and guess what? This clever ash-blond doofus left her personalized gold cheque card in the ATM… get the sms back at SIL’s that my card has been cancelled. Have to drive back, rush into the bank and get another card. They charge you R90-00 for a temporary card while you wait for a new gold personalized card. I told them screw it. I’ll keep the temporary one as my permanent one. I don’t care if I can’t get ebucks, I didn’t get ebucks in the first place. Not as far as I can tell, anyhow.

So yesterday’s viewing was okay! Hubby is drawn to the double garage (more space to store all our crap) but the place itself is a bit small. We’re worried that our stuff won’t fit. The yard is huge though. The cats will be spectacularly happy. And it’s two blocks down from the one creche. But no, I don’t think we’ll take it. It’s just a bit too small. And the woman who lives there -kind and bubbly as she is – looks like one of those people on Hoarders on the TLC channel… there’s stuff everywhere. It was difficult to get a feel of what the place is like when there will be space! Maybe that’s why it looked small to us. Sigh. Oh well, still looking at two places tomorrow. And I’m hopeful that either one of them will be it.

Had some more people over looking at the place last night and this morning. And another guy wants to come look this afternoon. Still no word from Landlady whether its being taken yet. I told everyone to phone her and she’ll then let me know what’s going for what.

I’m glad it’s Friday!

Oh, and work paid SARS… but they still want my returns that I haven’t submitted – I have no idea how I’m going to find out who the hell Class A Trading is! So now, I have to pay work back – R 900-00 a month for the next six months. I had a panic attack at this. We’ll never survive without that R 900-00. Then Hubby pointed out that at the end of April his bakkie will be paid off, so the money that goes to that normally will replace what we’ll be losing to work.

It was chilly this morning. Caleb and I were both trembling as I was changing his diaper when we both woke up. Apparently winter is coming early this year, April already. I don’t know if I’m happy or sad about it. I actually hate the winter. No rain, just chill and frost.

Have a great weekend y’all! be safe and if it’s hot where you are, keep cool!

Cheerio

Tourmaline